Anaerobic sizechart (including statistical metabolics & gravitational comparison)
sketch for the impending IONIC COLUMN MAN comic book. here also is the first paragraph of the text:
INTERIOR (Arts Gallery Entrance Hall): IONIC COLUMN MAN and XПЙθ, upon the beginning of their security shifts at the civic arts gallery, set their sights on a pair of personal favorite ruminant works. The first (highest up by three, equilateral, simply framed in petrified wood and a water-logged sliver of metastasized linens, handsomely adorned with the simple instructions: “1. Encornered 2. Ensconced 3. Leave me as I be”) has within and without its airspace a false depiction of the fourth sultan of S———-shire (ret. 116C^x), voluminous putrid hairpuff and all. A goatee could barely try to make it all better, but bar an incognito barber I doubt a single prince or pillager would care to know (ed. note: the sultan of mention (“sentence twice previous, n+(3/y) spaces back” - @ioniccolumnman, thanks for that clarification, now get back to work) has in historical fact no precise mention of hair-length, -depth, or -breadth, in case you cared). A small impression is noted 4.5cm from the right distal eye socket; probable cause including a stress-induced rupture during the 10-year caucuses of the lower floodplains (“a situation POORLY mishandled by the ground crews (or would that be skillfully mishandled as they mishandled so **** well)” - @ioniccolumnman, in a recent rebuttal statement), or perhaps a singular occurrence of the (.5k)x10^(n-4.2)mm ancillary approach window, cleverly disguised as an assassination attempt and seen as nothing more. Regardless, the sultanate remains, enshrined, sulfated, unrefined: resplendent orange hairfoam toasting in the summer brine.
